Power plays an important role in transgressive behavior because power inequality creates the conditions in which boundary violations occur more easily. When someone has more power, that person can abuse their position to cross boundaries, while the person with less power finds it more difficult to recognize, stop or report these boundary violations. This is especially common in work situations, families and organizations where hierarchical structures exist.

What is the link between power and transgressive behavior?

Power inequality is the basis upon which transgressive behavior can occur and persist. When a person is in a position of power, that person has resources, influence or authority that others do not. This inequality makes it easier for the person in power to cross boundaries because there is less resistance or dissent.

In work environments, for example, you see this when a supervisor uses his position to put pressure on employees. This pressure can be subtle, such as suggestions that are actually assignments, or more explicit, such as linking promotional opportunities to personal favors. The employee feels the inequity and knows that resistance may have consequences for his job or career.

Within families, power also plays a role in transgressive behavior. Parents have power over children, and when that power is abused, children cannot protect their boundaries. They depend on their parents for their basic needs and security, which makes them vulnerable. The same is true in situations where a person is financially or emotionally dependent on a partner.

In institutional contexts, such as healthcare, education or religious organizations, there is often a natural power imbalance between professionals and those they supervise. This inequality is sometimes abused because people in positions of power know that their authority protects them from complaints or consequences.

How do you recognize abuse of power in different situations?

Abuse of power can be recognized by patterns of behavior in which someone uses their position to exert control, overstep boundaries or manipulate others. These are not occasional disagreements, but repeated behaviors that exploit the power relationship.

In the workplace, you see abuse of power, for example, when a supervisor:

• Used rewards or punishments to drive personal behavior unrelated to work
• Withholding information that prevents you from doing your job properly
• You isolate from colleagues or important projects
• Normalizes inappropriate behavior by saying "everyone does this" or "that's just the way things are around here"
• Making you feel like you are overreacting or overly sensitive when you set boundaries

In personal relationships, abuse of power often manifests itself through subtle manipulation techniques. Someone may question your reality by denying that certain events took place, or by portraying your reactions as exaggerated. This is called gaslighting, and it undermines your confidence in your own perception.

Other signs are intimidation through authority, such as constantly emphasizing someone's position or status to keep you small. Or conditional behavior, where support, love or recognition is given only if you meet certain requirements.

The important thing is to watch for patterns. One incident may be a misunderstanding, but when you regularly find that you feel uncomfortable, your boundaries are not respected, or you start adjusting yourself to avoid conflict, there is probably an abuse of power.

Why is it harder to set boundaries when there is an imbalance of power?

With power inequality, setting boundaries is much more difficult because there are concrete and psychological barriers that prevent it. Fear of consequences plays a major role. When someone has power over you, resistance can lead to job loss, social exclusion, financial hardship or even retaliation.

This fear is not exaggerated. People who set boundaries against someone with power often actually experience negative consequences. They are passed over for promotions, get less interesting work, or are accused of difficult behavior. This reality makes many people afraid to defend their boundaries.

In addition, play internalized beliefs about authority a role. From a young age, we learn that we must respect and obey people in authority. This belief can run so deep that we begin to ignore our own boundaries because we think the person in power will know what is right.

Trauma reactions also make boundary setting difficult. When you are in a situation where you perceive power as threatening, your body may respond by freezing or going along. These are survival mechanisms that protect you, but at the same time make it difficult to actively set boundaries.

Dependence exacerbates these problems. When you are financially, emotionally or practically dependent on someone, resistance feels extra risky. You need that person for your income, housing, care or emotional support, which raises the threshold for setting boundaries.

Moreover, people with power often deliberately undermine the self-confidence of others. Making you doubt your perceptions, questioning your competencies, or portraying you as too sensitive erodes your confidence in your own boundaries.

What can you do when you are dealing with boundary crossing by someone with power?

When you are dealing with boundary crossing by someone with power, there are concrete steps you can take to protect yourself. Start by documenting incidents. Write down dates, times, what happened, who was there, and how you felt. This documentation can be important later if you seek help or file a complaint.

Seek support from people you trust. Talk to friends, family members or colleagues about what you are going through. Isolation reinforces the other person's power, while support helps you validate your reality and see options you may not see for yourself.

Inform yourself of your rights. Depending on the situation, you have legal protection against transgressive behavior. At work, for example, you can file a complaint with HR, the confidential advisor or the works council. In other situations, you can contact a lawyer, social services or a hotline.

Make a security plan for situations in which you feel threatened. This can include practical things like avoiding situations where you are alone with the person, arranging a safe place you can go, or preparing what you say when confronted.

Build a network of people who understand your situation and support you. These can be colleagues who have had similar experiences, friends who take you seriously, or professionals such as coaches or therapists who specialize in this type of situation.

Recognize when professional help is needed. If you find that the situation is affecting your health, sleep, concentration or well-being, it is wise to seek support from someone who has experience with transgressive behavior and trauma.

The important thing is not to blame yourself. Transgressive behavior is always the responsibility of the person crossing the boundaries, not you. You should not be ashamed of what happens to you or that you find it difficult to resist.

How Live The Connection helps with transgressive behavior

We understand how deeply transgressive behavior can affect you, especially when power plays a role. Our 5-step connection process helps you process these experiences and find your power again. We focus not only on understanding what happened, but more importantly on healing the impact it had on you.

Our approach enables you to independently reprogram your subconscious mind. This may sound abstract, but concretely it means that you learn to change the beliefs and reaction patterns created by boundary crossing. You rebuild your self-confidence and ability to set boundaries, from a place of inner strength.

What you get when you work with us:

• A structured process to process traumatic experiences without having to spend years in therapy
• Practical techniques to restore your confidence and sense of boundaries
• Support within a safe community of people who understand what you are going through
• Fast, measurable results through our holistic approach that heals body and mind together

Especially for people struggling with transgressive behavior, we offer a theme workshop on border crossing to. In this workshop, you will learn to process the impact of boundary violations and restore your boundaries in a healthy way.

You don't have to do this alone. Check out our workshop options and discover how you can permanently deal with the consequences of transgressive behavior.